Domi

Cold and windy days have arrived and gets darker sooner. Autumn slowly turns into winter. I have been painting monochromatic portraits of my friend Domi for last two weeks. Painting portraits of Domi brought to me lots of thoughts and feelings about femininity. It is so important and precious for me to be a woman. Also it is very beneficial to be surrounded in every day life by wise and inspiring women. Femininity is an inner power of women. It occurs in their sensuality, sexuality, wisdom, creativity and sensitivity. Sometimes women forget how to access their inner power, their 'eternal source of Mystery that is their strength' as Sarah Ban Breathnath describes. Sometimes they do not even realize how powerful and magical they are. Women need to remember that femininity is always with them. We all have got such a big capacity to love ourselves and others. Being in touch with our feminine nature is an act of love.


The blessing of being
Be the power of fire, be magical
Be the power of water, be beatiful
Be the power of earth, be who you are
Be the power of air, be all you wish to be

Time away

It is definitely true that time heals. My friend visited me last week. We have not seen each other for over a year. Despite the distance between us (Domi lives in Poland) I found our friendship exactly the same, like we have not changed at all. But we have. We have both experienced so much in the past year and are in different moments in our lives. We can still trust, be open towards each other and laugh, laugh, laugh as much as we used to. I love to laugh with her. I needed her company so much. She appeared in the most appropriate moment. After catching up with Domi in Edinburgh, I went to visit my parents in Poland. It was so good to spend time with them. It was also good to distance myself from my worries, to go away, to spend time with people who I love and miss so much. It is good to feel loved by them too. It inspired me. I captured beautiful images of people and autumn in my heart and it nourished my soul. Also I would never thought that strawberries could taste so sweet in October (thank you Scott). I am back in Edinburgh now. I am rediscovering familiar spaces, the smell of the air and the peace inside and around me. I am ready  again.

Photographs from Poland

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There are ups and downs in our lives. There is also time when we make mistakes. The same mistakes  we have made and regretted in the past so much, hoping that finally we would learn from them. However, sometimes things and circumstances turn out differently than we would expect. We feel tired and a bit scared, stuck and blocked that we make the same mistakes again. Then sorrow and guilt come and we are facing the most difficult of consequences. We are trying to release ourselves from our inner pain. We want to forgive ourselves and let go but we do not know how. This is how I have been feeling recently. I have felt a little lost and distant from myself.

I decided to take some time to find my happiness again.

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I would like to thank you for all your beautiful comments. Thank you for sharing your autumn thoughts with me. Your words make my autumn posts fully complete.

My autumn

My autumn, this year is full of rusty colours and light, walks, cosy evenings under blanket and in front of the fire, books and movies which now I have time to read and see. My autumn this year is a journey to the memories. It is also time of giving myself space to be with myself, to find what I lost during busy summer. It is time when nature slows down and gets itself ready to rest for months in the winter. It is time when beauty transforms from youth to maturity.
I would like to share my micro autumn captured in photographs with you. I hope you enjoy it and fall in love with this beautiful season just like I did.

Meanwhile

Meanwhile autumn has come for good. Summer is gone till next year. People on the streets are wrapped up in cozy and warm clothes. Rainy days have arrived too. But it is so beautiful around. Autumn is so inspiring. I have started to knit mittens. Knitting is a great way to relax. I also painted my portrait based on the photograph from childhood. Autumn is definitely a journey to my memories. It is nice to sometimes take a  trip to the past and see what there is. This process of painting helped me to come back to childhood moments. I am also reading a great book, written by Jean Liedloff. 'The continuum concept' presents the early years from such a different perspective which mostly places an impact on the natural and practiced approach to parenting by our ancient relatives. It is a great book which helps me to understand myself a bit more and my work as well. I hope that autumn is kind and inspiring for you too. I took a lovely stroll with Scott and his friend Matthew last weekend. We were all fulfilled by magic and beauty of the season and we all set up ourselves to create: stunning photographs taken by Matt (please have a look) and beautiful music composed by Scott (please, listen) and I could carry on with my painting. However there also days when I do not have much energy, feel tired or overwhelmed but then another day comes and strength comes back naturally. My last Sunday morning was a moment when I woke up refreshed and ready to start again, step by step. When nature helped me to heal and relax. I spent that morning in the kitchen, catching up with Lisa's blog (she is my friend but also a great writer and artist) and admiring sun light coming through the bushes and tress. All those create spectacular beauty and atmosphere which nurture a tired soul.
I wish you all, lots of magical and inspiring moments this autumn.

Wind of memories

Hey beautiful souls. I hope you enjoy beginnings of autumn, those  who live in the northern hemisphere. It became slightly colder, air is clearer, evenings are getting longer and longer and leaves are falling down. I love autumn! It is full of melancholy and nostalgia. Probably that is why I have been thinking about past so much recently. There are lots of memories which come and go, just like a wind. Memories from childhood, memories of my family and home. Autumn walks in the park when I was in the nursery, picking up leaves and chestnuts, my mum making pickles, my dad's smile, Christmas at grandparents house, joy after listening good music or reading a brilliant book, my old friends, places which I have been, playing outdoors when I was little, whispering a prayer before a sleep, favorite teddy which I put into bin because I decided to be grown up and I regret it so much now, my first cat and many, many more.Sometimes I am scared that I will not remember all those good and magical moments which have happened already. Painting definitely helps me to remember. Memories are very inspiring for me. My latest painting is a portrait of Scott. Scott surrounded by joy and coziness with his heart full of love and kindness. One memory of many saved on the canvas.
Love and blessings to you all.

Kicior

Ladies and Gentlemen I would like to introduce you to Kicior. My big, charmful and dearest friend. He is  full of infinite wisdom and unconditional love. Scott and I love him very much and we are so grateful to share our time with him. Kicior has been with us for over 3 years now. He jumped through our window one day and after visits spanning months, he decided to stay with us. We fell in love with him straight away and he bonded with us as well. Kicior is 5 now. He loves being fed, playing outside and snuggling into blankets. I always wanted to paint his portrait and finally I did. It is my first animal portrait and I am so glad that it was him. Kicior has been a great inspiration for Scott as well. He wrote a beautiful song about him (please, listen here) and included him in his music videos (here and here). He is a great companion in our creativity process.

Kicior