Monday, 2 July 2018

2

I could write so much about him. He is present in every aspect of my life. I am endlessly and deeply grateful for him. He has brought so many changes into our lives but the most important he brought so much love. Love which is beyond everything.




Thank you Elliot.

Monday, 28 May 2018

Me now



I have not posted any of my works for a while. However I did manage to do few pieces. Most of my works now are related to Elliot's childhood and his connection with nature and land. They are raw but full of heart at the same time, there are memories and dreams, moments captured in strokes of the brushes.
Painting is still a big part of me. I am grateful that I can nourish that part from time to time.
What makes me happy those days- being with Elliot, sun, being outdoor, gardening, dreaming, reading, painting
What scares me- emotionless mothers and heartless parenting, lack of smiles on people faces.



Thursday, 17 May 2018

Today

Day when everything seems to be in the right alignment. not perfect but just right. Maybe all days are like that we just do not acknowledge them. Day when I loose but gain at the same time. Spring, spring, spring, almost overwhelmed by sun and greenness.




Wednesday, 2 May 2018

Edinburgh

Time away. Time with family. A journey. Time with a book in the evenings. Fresh and happy mind. We all realized how much we needed to go away and change surroundings. We realized how important is to remember to do it again in a while.

Edinburgh. Place which still feels like home to us.








Sunday, 15 April 2018

Moon time






Moon can have so many meanings. It can be perceived as a visual object, mystery, energy, force and power, inspiration and even love and character.
 Our moon from our walks to the woods, from our garden, from the books read before bedtime, painted and drawn and loved.

Saturday, 10 March 2018

My toddler






My son as a toddler. Beautiful personality comes into the bloom. Every day brings more understanding and more words, lots of words. It is a time of new challenges and discoveries. I am learning through love, I am learning by loving my son to be better person for myself and others too. Every day brings more understanding for me as well, how to love, how to give space and comfort, how to stay calm, patient and compassionate. 

Friday, 16 February 2018

Me now

Spring is coming. I can feel it in the air in spite of today's snowfall. Snowdrops are popping out from the ground and unfortunately found first tick too.
Spring is coming. It is like another new beginning,  another fresh start. Winter gave me time. It was time to rediscover myself as a person, gave me time to find the place in myself where I am now and not to be scared to look there but to enter it with joy and acceptance. Being a mother is still processing in me. It is like a puzzle which pieces finally start to come together one by one, slowly creating a whole picture. This picture is me. Being a mother is like living on different planet (thank you Lisa for describing it so well). Planet which I have never lived before. It takes time to understand it, to get through it without resentments of not having time, of loosing yourself for a little while at the beginning.It takes time to feel good in mothers skin.  and Yes mothers gain so much, they gain so much love that there are no words to describe it. I have been reading, following some blogs, came back to yoga and painting a little too. Painting is different now, there is no rush, no aim, just creating, giving myself time to do a little at the time.
Today I was looking at my son, still little toddler. I was thinking that one day he will become a man, a grown up man. It is so good to see him so happy every day, curious, adventurous and always in the present moment. I was thinking what my parents must have thought about me at this age. Did they see it too? That joy of being here and now, that endless love, being grateful for this little, big person in our lives and did they wonder too about me as a little girl who one day would have become a woman and mother?
It is true that we are created to love.